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HOW DO I HELP MY TEEN THROUGH THE DEATH OF A FRIEND?

4/7/2016

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Wow, this month is a difficult topic. How can something that happens every day seem so foreign when it enters our world? But isn’t that what death does? It comes roaring in like a lion and leaves a deep scar on everyone it touches!

And somehow, as a parent, you feel you need to have the answers to help your teen deal with the loss of a friend. Please know that sometimes, initially, the best answer for your teen is to have no answer at all except to hold them and cry with them or yell with them or do whatever it is your teen needs to do to survive the moment. And yes, it is about surviving it especially early on.
We were not created to die and that is why it feels like the very fiber of our being is literally torn to pieces when we have to deal with death. And when the death of a young person enters your world, it seems to make even less sense.

You have spent the majority of your teen’s life protecting them from the hurt of this world. Now you can’t, but you can give them a safe place to feel and heal. Often parents go into survival mode and try to make their teen deal with this event quickly so that they can get “back to normal living.” But even Jesus felt the grief that death brings. It states in Luke that Jesus wept at the tomb of his friend Lazarus.

This is a time in your teen’s life that maybe they just need to know that you are there with or without answers. Because the questions eventually come, but the tears need to come first.
https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/117315816/d6588b3fd8

Walking with you,
Matt
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    Matt Downing is the Student Pastor at First Baptist Church in Pflugerville, TX.   He is married to Melody and has 3 children, Caleb, Collin and Chloe.

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