Quick question for you. How many of your blowouts have occurred over the issue of trust and them earning your trust? A parent recently shared this with me. They told their teens (now grown):
“IT IS NOT MY JOB TO TRUST YOU, BUT IT IS YOUR JOB TO TRUST ME, AS THE PARENT, THAT I KNOW WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU.”
WOW. Powerful words. But of course we want to be able to trust our kids, don’t we? I have a tool for you that will help you as you strive to build trust in your home. It’s called the Contract Pack. In this pack, are “contracts” for the use of several things that teenagers want to have your trust in: cell phones, being home alone, technology, and video games. Here’s a quote from the creator of this pack:
“If you’re like most of the parents that I work with, what you want is to have a teenager that’s trustworthy. So what we have here is an opportunity to create an economy that can make your
family strong. How does each party get what they want? To establish a trust economy, you need to communicate to your teenager, “Hey, do you want freedom? I want to make lots of freedom available to you. But the currency you use to purchase freedom from me is trust. If you can build trust, then you can exchange it for freedom.” Once that economy is established in your home, it sets a track for your family. A track to help you move toward building a close relationship. Most of the fighting and bickering is handled when there is an understanding about the trust economy”.
You can find the Contract Pack on the Parent Resource page